Skip to main content

Emerging from a Dark Place


As some of you may know on May 18th of 2014 I suffered a great loss. This sent me into a dark place. A place of confusion, fear, self doubt and depression. That was a big hole that proved very hard to crawl out of. At one point I though I could see the top, but slipped and was surrounded by it all once again. I'm not saying I've overcome all this but the daily dealing with it has become easier. Things look more positive and I'm thinking of the future once again. I had no idea how hard it would be. Few people know the depths I sank to. Coming out and saying this isn't easy either. I've always hid my negative emotions and only
share the good side of things. Now in an attempt to come into my new life I want to share it in this blog once again. 

During the first 9 months or so I stopped sewing/quilting and did little jewelry design. The only thing I felt like doing was drawing, and I did a lot of that. I guess it was a therapy of sorts. I poured out my inner emotions on paper. For months the drawings were in black and white. The drawing below was me missing my little dog, who had to be put down a month prior to my husbands death. Suddenly it was very quite and lonely in the house. 



So in time I started getting used to the empty house, the quite and the loss of my old routines. For a long time I just didn't know what to do with the extra time. I didn't want to create, go places or even think too much. After many months things started to change and new things started taking the place of the old. I am still not as organized as I used to be but working on it. Hopefully restarting my blog and reopening my Etsy shop will give me things to work towards. I know things won't come back to where they were, that life is gone. I do hope to now form a new life and see what it will bring to my future. 

Comments

Gene Black said…
Oh my friend, I am so sorry it has been such a rough time. I know from personal experience that you never "get over it" - but you do learn to cope. If you need me to help you - whether it is someone to talk to, cry with, or spur your creative soul....let me know. Email and I will give you my number if you want to call.

Your drawing is wonderful, heartfelt and -yes- it evokes some sadness. Your feelings came through, and that is the gift of a true artist.

Popular posts from this blog

Another Big Change...

 that I'm thrilled about. 

Next week unless something unforeseen happens I'll be closing on the sale of my 1925 house in East Nashville and moving away from the part of town I was born, grew up and lived in for the bulk of 61 years. 

This little town is no longer little, or quite, or like I remember. It's growing by leaps and bounds. I like change don't get me wrong but this is too much too fast. I think it's great that for the first time in my memory there is a restaurant close enough to walk to. 
There are great little art galleries, shops and wonderful restaurants popping up all over the place. The meat and three I've eaten at for 15+ years is now very popular. All of this is good - great even. 

But now I want slow and quite.  I've heard that 90+ people a day are moving to Nashville! So I figure this is the time to sell my house and move out of town to a nice quite place. So I call a friend who just happens to be a great realtor and bam! She finds me a house…

Holidays - Oh how I love them

I've just put the last show of the year behind me and now it's time to really get going for the holidays. I have a quilt on the machine ready to be quilted. Fabric stacked on the other machine ready to be cut. Canvases ready for backgrounds - well in other words - fun stuff a-plenty. 

The weather has turned cool - cold and it will soon be Thanksgiving. Since this is my first Thanksgiving in my new home we will have our dinner here. The turkey is waiting in the frig and the menu settled and the shopping done - I think I'm ready. 

For some reason the days before the holidays I always feel the need to do something new to the house. Why... don't you have enough on your plate? I guess not. Yesterday I painted an accent wall in the kitchen and hung a shelf and photos. The kitchen is yellow, it's a nice color of yellow, but I'm just not crazy about yellow. I went grey on this wall and I really like it.


This is only part of the wall, there are more photos etc, but this sh…

Managing Time

One thing I have found during the last 10 months is I have trouble managing my time like I have in the past. Seems like distractions and life run all over the schedules I make. I sometimes wonder if I'm like the little dog in UP and get the squirrel distraction.
For what ever the reasons this blog has drifted off into my Scarlet area of "I'll deal with it tomorrow. "

With my first show of the year just a few weeks out I'd normally be in full swing of creating new pieces for the show. I have only started creating again a few months back and seem to be getting into the flow of working at my bench once again, thou now as regular as I did in the past.  Here are a few of the recent items.


 This brass butterfly was given a rusted look with alcohol inks. 
An old sewing machine bulb, the end of a fork and some wings created this pendant
The focal element of this necklace is from a vintage bracelet
Then one day I decided to get out the poly clay again.  I've not done anythin…